Four Months

Today marked four months since my mother died. There is nothing really significant about four months but my fiance thought it would be nice if we went to the Buddhist Temple to have a puja service in her memory.

It was really nice of her to think of doing this and going to the temple and performing devotional and wholesome deeds on behalf of my departed mother is very comforting. We spent about two hours at the Wheaton Temple with the head monk and it was really nice.

For the service the monks chanted various Buddhist Sutras and asked that we all hold good thoughts in our hearts and minds for my mother. The combination of the monks chanting and loving, compassionate thoughts for my mother was soothing and euphoric. It is nice to be able to think about mom in a positive and loving way in a such a calm, compassionate and supportive environment that the monks and the temple provide. The monks are reassuring and don't try to skirt around the realities of life and death.

This is a great service, because there are moments which I am sure we all share when the memories of our our lost loved ones creep into our minds seemingly out of nowhere. The timing may not be convenient or perhaps we have unpleasant memories or feelings of crushing guilt. Normally we usually don't think of setting up a controlled time and environment when we can really think about our lost loved ones and actively work with any feelings we may have. This ceremony provides that opportunity. Today I had the chance to think about mom and hold her close to my mind and heart in a manner that is healthy and helpful for the grieving process. I had all the time I needed and did not have to be bothered with getting back to work or having to do this or that. No, this time was for her and I and I was happy to have it and thankful that my fiance and her mother took time to share it with me as well.

I certainly plan to take advantage of this service whenever I can. As I said it is really helpful and in such a busy world where the demands of life don't tend to allow you to stop and reflect on loss it's nice to know I have this option whenever I need it and that there are compassionate monks that are available for me when I need them.

May you be well, happy and peaceful!