Spiritual Burn Out

I am going through a period of spiritual burn out. Has this ever happened to you? At some point the blows of life, poor choices and the consequences of past decisions just leave you lifeless on the side of the road of life. This has been my experience for the last month. It’s not the first time this has happened but this is the first time that I actually have some insight as to why. And because of this insight I am optimistic that I will pull out of it. So, I just want to take a few lines to outline three things I have observed to be at the root of this current spiritual burn out I am going through.

First of all I am experiencing a different feeling then I have in times of spiritual strength. Generally I have gauged my spiritual progress on how I am feelings. I tend to go as those feelings go and if those feelings don’t arise or do arise I tend to think there is something wrong or right and inevitably I start to slip. So, I am seeing first hand that feelings are not reliable to cling to. They are just phenomena that come and go and trying to hold on to them is like trying to catch the wind in my hands.

Second, I tend to push too hard and have an extreme nature about me. The Buddha didn’t call his teaching the “Middle Path” for nothing. There is a simple brilliance to balance but it is not a state of mind that is easy to gain. I usually take the “eat the whole pie in one bite” approach to my spiritual progress. I want to absorb and gain all the knowledge in the world in one instant. In addition I have the tendency to become a spiritual “pack rat” and “Jack of all trades”. I go around collecting and piling up all things spiritual but not mastering any. Eventually I am mentally cluttered and have no idea what to do with all the “stuff” I have collected. So, I am learning to stick with the basics, develop the fundamentals and form a strong foundation I can work from.

Third, and most important, I have realized the effect that being untruthful can have on my spiritual progress. I told what one may consider a “little white lie”, last month. Telling that lie was like throwing a bucket of water on my spiritual camp fire. It has been really hard to recover from that unskillful action. If I told you what it was you would certainly say it was no big deal but no matter what the opinion the effects can’t be disputed. I learned a lesson from it and I am going to tell you from personal experience that lying can take the wind right out of your spiritual sales no matter how “small” the lie may seem to be.

So, this has been therapeutic for me and I get the sense I will be able to get back on the path, back on the cushion and back in balance. These kinds of experiences are sometimes the best way to learn. I can’t be too hard on myself nor can I be too easy on myself; “I’m” all “I” have to work with. I have learned a lesson that I need act on. We shall see how this all turns out.

I wish you the best of luck in your spiritual journey. I would love to hear your experience and appreciate your encouragement so feel free to leave a comment.

May you be well, happy and peaceful!

Rafael